Seized With Life
by Attic Man
Summary: The Weekenders. Tino is confronted with his past and the lives of his friends. Complete.
1. Endless Days Of Childhood

Seized With Life – Chapter One: Endless Days Of A Childhood  
  
It was Friday. The sun was shining as bright as ever and the town of Bahia Bay was alive with the sights and sounds of summer. Children's laughter echoed throughout the park as children ran about playing their games. The beach also had its fair share of patrons young and old alike. Some made sand sculptures while others thrashed about in the ocean and while others still simply lay in the sun trying to get the perfect tan. A wondrous bay breeze brought the sweet scent of the ocean up into the town and blanketed the area. The sky had a few white fluffy clouds floating through it but blue was the color of the day. It seemed to stretch on forever and looked a perfect reflection of the ocean water. On a high hill looking down Bahia Bay must have looked like a paradise. Its peaceful and beauteous exterior was matched evenly with the town folk all of whom were friendly people that made sure to keep Bahia Bay sparkling. The town had an undeniable charm to it. Those who visited instantly fell in love with it and those who lived there counted their blessings. Bahia Bay had possibly never looked better than on this particular day. It was a day to be remembered for years to come and locked away in people's hearts and minds. Taking in the beauty was young Tino Tonitini who was sitting on his front steps. He was gazing at the sky his face completely devoid of any emotions which was a very rare occurrence. As a matter of fact there had been only one other time where Tino looked like this. Tino's mom walked out from the house and looked at her son with concern. She put a hand on one of his shoulders trying to breathe life back into him.  
  
"Tino, I'm sorry about this, but there is no other choice," she said quietly.  
  
Tino didn't say a word and he didn't move a muscle. He didn't want to hear this. There was nothing that could comfort him. Tino just wanted to be left alone with his thoughts so he could try and get himself to understand the situation. The whole thing seemed so unfair. How could they change everything around on him? Why was he so powerless?   
  
"I live one way for so many years and now they just go and change it all around on me. No one asked my opinion on this. No one is considering what I think, what I feel. I'm just an innocent bystander in all of this," Tino thought.  
  
He looked down on the steps and saw a pebble. He picked it up and lightly tossed it up and down in his one hand. He continued to think about everything and with each passing moment he felt himself grow angrier. Eventually Tino actually trembled from his boiling emotions. He quickly stood up and hurled the pebble in his hand into the sky. Tino wanted to scream but he held his tongue and swallowed the scream back down. A bit of familiar chatter came from the corner of the street and Tino looked up to spot Tish, Carver, and Lor walking down the street. They were no doubt there to pick up Tino to head off to the pizza shop. The three greeted Tino cheerfully, but Tino responded with a sad wave of his hand. Seeing them there at this time killed Tino inside. Had this been any other day Tino would have been happy to see his friends and he would have joyfully run off with them. Tino once again looked down at his steps afraid that if he looked at his friends he might cry.  
  
"What's the matter, T? You look pretty upset," Carver asked.  
  
Tino wanted to answer but he feared how his response would come out. His friends looked at each other now worried themselves for Tino's sake.  
  
"Tino, if something is bothering you then let's talk about it. Please tell us what's wrong," Tish pleaded.   
  
Still Tino sat silently.  
  
"C'mon, dude, we're your friends we want to help you. Just tell us what's up,' Lor added.  
  
Tino could feel his throat trembling but the words he wanted just weren't there.  
  
"Well, how about this? You tell us what's bothering you when you are ready and in the meantime we go grab a pizza. Things always look better over a pizza I always say," Carver said.  
  
The two girls nodded in agreement with the suggestion.  
  
"Sounds like a good plan, Carver. Let's go Tino," Tish said.  
  
The group turned to leave but Tino finally spoke up.  
  
"I can't go."  
  
The words trembled a bit and were filled with both sadness and anger. Lor, Carver, and Tish looked at each other nervously hearing Tino's voice.   
  
"Why can't you go?" Carver asked.  
  
Tino finally looked up at his friends.  
  
Mustering up everything he could, Tino said, "Because… I have to pack."  
  
"Pack? Are you going on a vacation?" Lor asked.  
  
"No," Tino said bluntly.  
  
The others were a bit confused now.  
  
"Well if you aren't going on a vacation, then what are you packing for?" Tish inquired.  
  
Tino tried his hardest to keep his composure.  
  
"I am packing because I am moving."  
  
The words came slow and each one stung as it passed. Silence settled over the friends. No one knew what to say, no one knew what they could say.  
  
Eventually Carver broke the silence asking the only thing that came to mind, "Where are you moving to?"  
  
"I'm moving to Philadelphia to live with my Dad," Tino answered with anger and sadness in his voice.  
  
The others were stunned. Not only was Tino moving away but he was moving clear across the country.  
  
"When do you move?" Tish asked.  
  
"Tomorrow," Tino answered.   
  
"Tomorrow?!" The others gasped.  
  
"But that's so soon. This means that today is the last day for all four of us to hang out. That's so unfair!" Lor lamented.  
  
"I know, but I only found out myself late last night. I hate it. I don't really want to move and leave you guys, but I wish I had at least more time before I left."  
  
"I can't believe it. This is the last day for us to be a group. I never thought this day would come so soon," Carver remarked.  
  
The four friends were silent once again all contemplating exactly what this meant. Somehow the silence was deafening on Tino's small stoop.  
  
Tish choked back a sob and tried to talk with her most positive voice, "Well then I guess we are just going to have the best time possible after Tino is done packing. I know we should all help so we get done quicker and have more free time to make this the best time ever."  
  
Despite his current condition Tino smiled a little. He wanted to make his last day in Bahia Bay as good as possible not drag it down.  
  
"Sounds like a good idea. Let's get to work then."  
  
The others smiled a little as well happy that they would have one last fun filled day. The friends went to Tino's room and began sorting through the mess. They hadn't realized just how much Tino had nor did they realize how many memories and stories were connected with the items in his room. Every little thing seemed to be reminder of all the good times they had over the years. It felt like they were packing away their childhood for them to send away. It took a couple hours but eventually everything was packed and ready to go. The room was empty aside from the bed and the stack of boxes next to the door. The four friends looked at the emptiness around them.  
  
"Wow. I don't think I've ever seen this room so clean. I never realized how large this room is either," Lor commented.  
  
"Yeah, it's quite spacious once there is nothing in it. I wonder what my new room will be like," Tino said.  
  
"Hopefully it'll be as nice as this one. I always liked this room. I mean you have to step up to reach your bed. How cool is that? Man, I'm gonna miss coming here," Carver mentioned.   
  
"Yep, this room has been good to all of us. How many meetings and plans have been devised in here?" Tino remarked.  
  
"Too many to count. I consider this room a home away from home. Why I think we've learned some of the most important lessons right here in this room. It feels weird knowing that this is the last time being in here," Tish said.  
  
They all nodded and looked it over once more soaking up the last moments in that room.   
  
"No sense in staying here. Let's go live it up one last time just like we always have," Tino said mustering a smile.  
  
The four friends ran out of the house and headed to their one of their staple hang-outs, the ever changing pizza place. They shared a large pepperoni pizza with no toppings on Tish's part of course. Over the meal the friends shared even more stories of their childhood. They reminisced about Lor's multiple attempts at impressing Thomson, Tino's incessant obsessing, Tish's many bossy occasions, and Carver's numerous egotistical or overdramatic episodes. Even at such a young age they had enough stories to last them into the night. They walked back to Tino's house laughing and chiding each other about the past. However, once they arrived in front of Tino's house the laughter dwindled.  
  
"So what time are you leaving tomorrow?" Carver asked.  
  
"My flight takes off at noon so I'm leaving my here at 10:30," Tino answered.  
  
"All right we'll make sure to be by to say our good byes then."  
  
The four friends stared at each other in silence for a few moments.  
  
"I enjoyed today. It felt like a fitting end for my time here in Bahia Bay. Thanks guys, I really had a good time," Tino commented his voice full of emotion.  
  
"Hey, we always have a good time. We don't do things any other way, dude," Lor said.  
  
"Yeah, you can always count on us. Plus, it's always good to finish on a high note," Tish added.  
  
Tino smiled a little at them all.  
  
"Thanks guys," he said softly.   
  
"Well, it's time for us to be going. We'll see ya tomorrow, T. Later days," Carver said.  
  
"Later day," Tino responded.  
  
Carver chuckled a little and waved. Tino waved back and went inside to end the day. Once Tino was inside he went to his room and lay down on his bed. It felt so empty almost like it was going to swallow Tino up into nothingness. As he nodded off into sleep it really felt like he being sucked into a void falling away into darkness. In Tino's mind it felt quite pleasant all he needed to do there was float around. It was like swimming only easier. Tino enjoyed that peace and quiet and it made him feel at ease. The dream was shattered by a bird chirping loudly right outside Tino's window. Tino drearily opened his eyes realizing his few minutes of peace had actually been several hours of sleep. Today was the day.  
  
"Morning already? That sleep went by too fast. I wanna do it again only have time go slower," Tino thought.  
  
He rolled out of bed and cleaned himself up in the bathroom. He went back to his room and got dressed. Tino looked at the clock and saw that it read 9:30. He went to the kitchen where he found breakfast all ready for him. His mom was seated at the table drinking some type of tea. She followed Tino with her eyes and felt sorry for the boy.   
  
Once Tino sat down she said to him, "It won't be so bad Tino. I'm truly sorry about this, but it'll be okay, honey."  
  
Tino didn't respond he simply kept eating his food. Ms. Tonitini sighed.  
  
"I guess I can't blame you for not talking with me. I just want you to know that I am sorry and that I love you."  
  
Tino continued to eat but in between bites he muttered, "I know and I love you too."  
  
Soon the time came for Tino to load his luggage in the car. As he started Tish, Lor, and Carver showed up.  
  
"Here let us give you a hand with that," Carver offered.  
  
The friends all grabbed the boxes and arranged them neatly in the car so nothing was being crushed or in danger of falling.  
  
"There, that takes care of that. Now for the hard part," Tino remarked.  
  
All four youths stood their silently not sure how to say good bye. Finally after having repressed her feelings since the day before Tish broke into tears and hugged Tino.  
  
"This is so unfair! You can't leave! What are we going to do without you?"  
  
Tino hugged her back.  
  
"Don't worry. You'll survive. I know it's hard to deal with but it could be worse. The world could be coming to an end," He commented.  
  
Tish let go of Tino but she still continued to cry. Lor stepped forward and gave Tino a bit of an awkward hug since she wasn't too used to something like this.  
  
"It won't be the same without you, Tino. It's gonna suck."  
  
Lor stepped away from Tino and now Carver came forward.  
  
"What can I say? You're the bets friend a guy could have. I'm not sure what we'll do with you leaving. No matter what though, we're friends till the end even if you are on the other side of the country."  
  
Tino nodded.  
  
"Thanks guys. It means a lot to have you all here. I'm glad we are all friends. I've loved every moment of being with you guys, and I wouldn't trade it for the world. Don't worry, I'll write to you and send you my new address and phone number. So now for one last time while I'm still right here, later days."  
  
Tino waved and headed for the car. He turned back to his friends and waved once more. They all waved back and Tino could see tears in the eyes of Carver and Lor while Tish cried outright. Tino got in the car and waved to his friends till they were gone from his sight. He looked at the sky, it was a beautiful blue. The sun shone, the birds chirped happily, and the wind brought the smell of the bay to the town. Just like the day before Bahia Bay looked like a paradise. It was a slice of Heaven that had come down to Earth. Its beauteous charm stuck in Tino's mind like a dagger. He wanted to keep alive its beauty in his mind as he finally left that magnificent town.  
  
As the car passed the town limits, Tino thought to himself, "Farewell."   
  
End Of Chapter One 


	2. Heaven Shines Down Upon Us

Seized With Life - Chapter Two: Heaven Shines Down Upon Us  
  
The road into Bahia Bay was quite lonely. It was a rare sight to see a car driving there these days. Often weeks would go by before a single car showed up. This day, however, was one of the rare days where a car was driving along the road. Heading into Bahia Bay, no less. It was a small red car that had definitely seen better days. Its driver was former resident Tino Tonitini who had also seen better days. The drive into town was a long and nerve racking one for him. It had been 35 years since he was last in town having moved to the east coast when he was 14 years old. The whole way Tino was unsure of if he really wanted to show up in Bahia Bay after all this time. If the reason for him being there wasn't so important then he probably never would have made the journey back. A few days earlier he had received a letter notifying him of his mother's death and when the funeral was to be held. The letter itself was quite strange. It was brief as possible and did not contain any information as to who sent the letter. There was no return address on the envelope either. For all Tino knew this was some practical joke. However, something convinced him that it was legitimate. Perhaps it was just his desire for an excuse to take off from work and do something different than the usual grind. It had been a long trip and one that took a lot out of Tino. His mind was filled with a million thoughts, not sure what to expect when he entered Bahia Bay once more.

"There it is, Bahia Bay. I never thought I would see it again. It's been so long, so very, very long," Tino thought to himself once he saw the sign welcoming him to Bahia Bay.

The sign had horribly faded since the last time he saw it. Off on the horizon Tino spied some ominous looking clouds perched above the ocean.

"Damn, it looks like a storm is coming. I hate driving in the rain. Now where is this funeral parlor?"

Tino checked the address on the letter. He racked his mind trying to remember the streets of Bahia Bay. He looked at the address again and it finally clicked. The funeral parlor was close to the edge of town, not far from where Tino was currently driving. After following a few streets he came upon the parlor. A bunch of cars with funeral flags were all parked out front.

"Hmmm, it looks like I'm a little late. I had better get in there."

Tino quickly parked the car and hurried over to the parlor. Once inside he sat down in the back hoping not to arouse anyone's notice. The room was full of people all there to pay their final respects to his mother. As he stared at all of the individuals Tino was able to discern who was who, though with some difficulty. Time had worn away the appearances Tino had been familiar with. At the front of the room leaning on a cane was Dixon. Time had done the least amount of damage to him. Tino noticed the ring on Dixon's finger.

"I never heard about that. Oh well, I can't say I really like weddings, too boring," Tino thought.

So far no one seemed to notice that Tino was seated in the back. Then again, no one could probably recognize him. People remembered a scrawny, energetic, and neurotic kid. These days Tino was best characterized as a balding, tired, and indifferent cynic. However, it wasn't simply a matter of people not realizing he was Tino, but no one seemed to recognize that another person had entered the building. It bothered Tino to no end.

"Isn't anyone curious that some run down guy just walked in? Am I invisible? I even got a letter to come to this. Shouldn't someone be looking for me?" Tino thought.

He tried to ignore the situation, but it still nagged him a little. Soon a minister of some kind came into the room and everyone took their seats. Now the casket was visible to Tino. He could see his mother's face from where he was seated. It had been 35 years since Tino had last seen his mother, but somehow she had barely changed in that time. Sure, her hair was gray, and she had some wrinkles, but her face had the same peaceful look that it always had. The last time Tino talked with his mother was 30 years prior just before he went off to college. He was never sure why communication had ceased, but he did remember that it didn't seem to bother him. Now, however, looking at his mother Tino wanted to hear her voice again. He wanted her to tell him why he was there, and who had sent for him after all this time. She could read his mind like always and figure out all the answers. Tino's mind drifted in and out. It was flooded with thoughts about his mother. He wasn't sure why, though. For 30 years since communications ceased with his mother he had given her no more than two thoughts. How did seeing her dead cause him to drift through 30 years of overdue thinking? Tino eventually came to thinking about his mother's death. He was curious to know how she died, what it was that did her in. Tino smiled a little.

"I know what happened," he thought, "It was bound to happen. Mom's food finally caught up to her."

The idea amused Tino enough to make him forget his earlier apprehension. As the minister continued to talk people began to tear up, a few softly sobbed. Tino looked to Dixon. He wasn't crying. He didn't even have a tear in his eye. His expression was emotionless, but it resonated with heavy thought. It made Tino smile.

"Leave it to Dixon. He always had the best grasp of every situaiton. Even death can't elude his understanding. Heh, he can do anything," Tino thought.

Eventually the minister stopped speaking and the floor was opened up to anyone who wanted to say a few words. Anyone who got up always stopped at Dixon at some point to either shake his hand or hug him. Dixon muttered a thank you to each person, yet his overall expression never changed. Tino found himself fascinated by Dixon's behavior. He barely even noticed the tear filled speechs being made by the other members of the congregation. They all sounded the same to Tino. After some time had passed the minister asked if anyone else wished to speak. Tino kept his eye on Dixon, but he made no movement towards the podium. The only movement Dixon offered was bowing his head as the casket was closed. Without thinking Tino also bowed his head. Then it dawned on him. He would never see his mother again in the flesh. His stomach fluttered, and his head went light for a moment. It all seemed so final now. He would never see her again, never, forever. The idea boggled Tino. It gripped his mind and shook it hard. The only thing more perplexing to Tino was the fact that this bothered him. Why did he care so much? He hadn't felt this much emotion in 35 years. Why after so long of being so far removed from this enviorment and his mother could he be brought down like this? Tino held his head in his hands just trying to keep himself from crying out. Everyone in the room stood and filed out except for the pallbearers. They all passed the unknown middle aged man, but no one stopped to ask who he was or if he was all right. Tino then stood and exited the building while the pallbearers lifted the casket. Everyone stood around outside waiting for the casket to come and lead the procession to the cemetary. It was going to be a walking procession since the cemetary was only two blocks down the road. Tino stood off to the side while everyone else milled around. Soon the pallbearers came out with the casket and they began walking for the cemetary. Everyone fell in line behind the casket. Tino waited to make sure he was last. However, he quickly lost last place to Dixon. Tino looked at him and noticed that Dixon's leg really slowed him down. The cane didn't really do much good. Within the first block he was already a good thirty feet behind everyone else. Tino kept his eye on Dixon, and he could see the frustration on his face. Dixon grumbled as he tried to move faster, but couldn't due to his limitations.

"He really must hate that. Even with the cane he can barely get around. It must be really irritating," Tino thought.

Rather than offer any help, though, Tino kept on walking. He was much more interested in seeing his mother laid to rest. He felt an overwhelming need to be there to watch it all end. By the time Tino reached the cemetary Dixon was lagging about sixty feet behind everyone else. Everyone stood around the grave and waited while Dixon made his way to the site. Hobbling as fast as he could Dixon took his place in the crowd. With everyone there, the minister began talking and doing some final rites. Tino stared at the casket and phased out. The feeling he got looking at the casket was so odd. He felt like he was staring mortality in the eye. The gray stormy sky lended itself to Tino's train of thought. What felt like five seconds to Tino turned out to be ten minutes. He was snapped back to reality when the casket was slowly lowered into the ground.

"So this is it. This ends it all. I'm surprised I feel this much. I haven't felt a damn thing in years. Have I been so dead inside that it took death itself to stir me this bit? That's pretty sad," Tino thought.

Even as the crowd began to disperse Tino stayed behind his eyes still fixated on the casket. The finality of it all was overwhelming.

"Excuse me, sir, is everything okay?"

Tino looked up startled. It was the minister, and it was the first words spoken to him since he had arrived.

"Uh, yeah, I'm fine. I'm just not too familiar with death, that's all. I'll be all right. Nothing to worry about. I just never appreciated how final death was till right now," Tino responded.

"I can understand that, but death really isn't final. Those who have are dead have moved onto a greater life than this. They are in the presence of God. From my correspondence with this woman I have no doubt in my mind that she has made it to Heaven, to paradise. I'm sure she is quite peaceful there, and I'm sure she is looking down at us right now smiling happily," the minister said.

"You think she's in Heaven, and that she is smiling?"

"Oh yes. Don't you think the same?"

"I think she's smiling...," Tino drifted off.

He wasn't sure what to make of Heaven. The minister looked at Tino with concern, not sure why he had stopped.

"Heaven is a wonderous place, my friend. It is there we are in God's midst and all our troubles vanish because we have worked through them. It is the goal of the righteous, the very thing for which we strive. This woman has made it to Heaven so we do not need to pray for her now, we need to pray for ourselves. Do you understand, my friend?"

Tino looked at the minister with distant eyes.

"I understand enough. I must be going now."

"I see, then I bid you good day. And remember one thing, my friend, the sadness that surrounds us is nothing before God and the glory of Heaven, always keep your head held high and look for the light."

Tino paused for a second, then nodded and he was off. As he walked back to his car Tino's mind was a jumble of thoughts. He would have walked right past his car had a rain drop not hit him square in the forehead. Tino looked up at the sky. It was only a few drops, but the clouds looked ready to burst.

"Shit, it looks like the rain is coming in. I hate the rain. I think I'll just wait it out rather than being caught in the middle of it when I'm driving."

Tino lowered his head and a figure in the distance caught his eye. It looked like a woman and she was staring at Tino. He squinted but she was too far away to see clearly.

"That woman..., Mom? No, that can't be right."

Tino stared hard but it was to no avail.

"What am I doing? How would I know anyone's appearence after 35 years? Wait, is she beckoning me?"

The woman indeed looked like she was waving to Tino, but she moved no closer to him.

"What the hell is her problem? Why is she waving to me? I guess I'll go talk to her, got nothing else to do."

Tino started walking in the direction of the woman but after he walked enough to somewhat make out her face she turned around and started walking away.

"Why is she walking away now? What's the deal with this woman? I suppose I should follow her," Tino thought.

Overcome with a strange curiosity, Tino kept on walking after the woman not sure where he was going.  
  
End Of Chapter Two


	3. Walking Through A Hidden Eden Of Paradis...

Seized With Life - Chapter Three: Walking Through A Hidden Eden Of Paradise  
  
The sky grew increasingly dark and it worried Tino a little. The fact that it was quite overcast yet it barely rained made him fear that something big was on its way. However, much more troublesome was the apparently fickle woman whom Tino was chasing after. Periodically she would stop walking away from Tino and simply stare at him, but every time Tino began to catch up she took off again. This little game of cat and mouse was taking its toll on Tino, and now he simply wished to reach the woman to spite her.  
  
"Damn it, woman. What's your problem? This is insane," Tino muttered to himself.  
  
No matter how hard Tino tried he could never get close enough to the woman. His body wasn't in good enough shape for something as stressful as this. Soon his legs were giving out on him and he stopped for a little while to rest. He wasn't worried about losing track of the woman since she never left him out of her sight. Tino sat down on a small wall nearby and closed his eyes. He breathed heavily trying to catch his breath. Tino opened his eyes and looked at his current surrondings. The building across the street looked slightly familiar. Tino dug deep into his mind to try and recall the place. It was missing a door and he could see that the place was completely gutted. It looked like the building had suffered a devastating blaze. The walls on the inside were black and a few pieces of wood were strewn on the floor all of which had burned ends.  
  
"What a depressing sight. I wonder what used to be here?" Tino thought.  
  
It was then that a large, partially smashed sign caught Tino's eye off to the side in a small alleyway. It read "Funville". The name echoed in Tino's mind.  
  
"Funville, Funville, it sounds very familiar. Why can't I remember this? Maybe this- no, wait, I got it. Funville. That's right I know this place. I know it well. At least I used to know it well."  
  
The crumbling building was a mere shell of it's former glory. Kids running every which way more noise than you could shake a stick at. The place was a haven, a getaway. It was a paradise of games. Now it was a decrepit shack of lost dreams.  
  
"I wonder how much money I spent there. How many games did I lose there? It's little more than a dream now."  
  
Somehow Tino couldn't tear himself away from looking at the pitiful sight. It drew him in and locked him in place. Perhaps his childhood was gnawing at him.  
  
"Well, I guess that the kids around have to find entertainment elsewhere. Although, I'm not sure where else you can go for the games that Funville had. Come to think of it, I haven't seen one kid anywhere around this town. That's certainly different from when I lived here."  
  
Tino looked away from the building not being able to bare it much more. He saw the woman down the road staring at him. Tino squinted to see her better. Her eyes looked like she was pleading him to keep moving.  
  
"Alright, alright, I'm getting up. You're a real demanding woman ain't ya? But I'll keep playing along with you," Tino said aloud as if the woman could hear him.  
  
Once Tino was on the move again the woman contnued to walk away. Turning throughout all the streets snaking through the town.  
  
"God, I never realized Bahia Bay had so many backstreets. C'mon woman, put an end to this already."  
  
Tino continued on panting and stumbling through the streets. He was determined to catch that woman and figure all of this out. However, his age and lack of exercise caught up to him and he had to rest again. Tino sat down on a small beat up bench, that was on the corner of the street. The woman, who was about half way down the street, turned and saw Tino resting so she too stopped walking. Tino looked at her and held up his hand motioning to give him a minute. Then he looked behind the bench at the building that stood there. It was a bank. It had an enourmous, gaudy piggy bank sitting on top of the building.  
  
"What an eyesore. I know this wasn't here 35 years ago. I'm sure I would remember it if it had been. Who agreed to the zoning notice on this?"  
  
Tino shook his head at the sheer absurdity of the pig. He much more enjoyed looking at the bench he was sitting on rather than at the bank. The bench was full of dents and splintered ends. Gum was embedded into certain spots and various words had been carved into the wood. Tino carefully went around reading some of the more legible things written on the bench. Most of the carvings were the dumb prattlings of children, but one at the end of the bench caught Tino's eye. The edge of the bench had a carving that read "Later days -Tino."  
  
"Hmmm, I can't remember writing that, but I must have at some point. That's odd, though, it doesn't seem like something I would do. Either way, before this bank there must have been something here that I cared about otherwise I wouldn't have sat on this bench at any time."  
  
Tino stared hard at the scenery trying to see if any of it could spark a memory in him. Slowly, piece by piece, the surrondings looked familiar to Tino. He got up and took a few steps away from the building and looked back at it again. He finally pieced it all together. The bank used to be the ever changing pizza shop.  
  
"I knew I had been here before. So the changing pizza shop finally changed into a whole new business? Nothing ever stays the same. It was just a matter of time. The money it must have cost to keep changing themes every week, no wonder it's no longer here."  
  
Tino stared at the place a little longer. Another hallmark of his youth no longer existed, and it made him feel a little like his childhood was disappearing forever.  
  
"I'm done resting here. Time to continue this trek of tranquility."  
  
Tino began walking towards the woman and she once again took off. This time the woman walked in a pretty much straight line, only turning once, much to Tino's delight. After the turn, Tino could tell that the woman was headed towards the ocean. He looked past the woman to the open expanse of the sea and saw horribly dark clouds rolling in. So far the clouds had kept at a very light drizzle, but Tino knew something strong was on it's way. The woman made it to the boardwalk and quickly turned off to the side out of Tino's view.  
  
"Damn it, woman. Wait for me, I'm not there yet."  
  
Tino tried to hurry a little, but he could only move so fast.  
  
"All right, I'm here, now if you would just-"  
  
Tino stopped walking. He had turned the corner but the woman had disappeared. She was nowhere in sight. Tino stared off down the boardwalk not sure what to make of the whole sitaution.  
  
"Fantastic, this is just what I needed, to be led around town by some strange woman who just disappeared. First my mother's funeral and now this, what a wonderful day. I should get out like this more often."  
  
Tino grumbled to himself now wondering why he ever started following the mystery woman.  
  
"Maybe I'm just losing my mind. Perhaps that woman was a figment of my imagination. Who knows, no point in really thinking about it anyway."  
  
Tino sighed, and for no reason whatsoever he began to walk down the boardwalk. Every building along the way looked the same. They all were in terrible shape, with boards nailed to a bunch of them. However, none of this seemed to penetrate Tino. He walked as if in a trance, deep in thought, yet not thinking a single thing. After walking a bit further the trance was broken when out of the corner of his eye, Tino spotted someone sitting on a bench. The person's back was to Tino, but he knew he had seen the person before. Tino approached the person slowly, since he still felt like he was in a trance. The person heard Tino walking forward and turned away from the ocean to look at him. It was Dixon. Ten feet stood between the two men, but no words were spoken. They simply stared at each other.

End Of Chapter Three


	4. These Are The Lambs Who Fell Into The Se...

Seized With Life - Chapter Four: These Are The Lambs Who Fell Into The Sea  
  
A moment or two passed as the two men stared at one another. There was no sign of movement from either, but the standoff was broken when Dixon smiled and laughed a little.  
  
"Well, how long has it been? It's good to see you again, Tino."  
  
Dixon's voice was a little raspier than it had been 35 years earlier.  
  
"It has been a while. It's hard for me to believe that I'm standing in Bahia Bay again. I barely recognize the place."  
  
"Yes, I'm sure that is so. Nothing has stayed the same. It is the unfortunate truth."  
  
Dixon's eyes looked sad as he finished. There was a slight silence and it made Tino shift nervously.  
  
"What about you? Have you changed?" Dixon asked.  
  
Tino paused. He wasn't sure how to answer the question.  
  
"Me? I'd say I 've changed. It's hard to stay the same for 35 years. What about you?"  
  
Tino wanted the light off of him.  
  
"Well aside from my right leg here, I'm still the same. Once you hit a time in your life it's easier to stay the same."  
  
"So you still know everything, eh?"  
  
Dixon laughed.  
  
"Of course, I'm an old man these days, why, I'm wiser than ever."  
  
Tino chuckled a little happy to know that at least one thing was still the same.  
  
"Can I assume you are here because of your mother's funeral?" Dixon asked.  
  
Tino nodded.  
  
"I see. I'm curious as to how you knew about it. No one has had contact with you in years."  
  
"Well, someone sent me a letter informing of the funeral. I don't know who sent it nor do I have any way of finding out, but I came anyway."  
  
Dixon looked a litle surprise.  
  
"Really? That's quite interesting. I have to wonder though after so many years what made you decide to follow the letter to here."  
  
Tino stood silently thinking the question over.  
  
"I don't know," he suddenly responded, "I have no clue what made me take the thing seriously, but I did. Maybe I just needed to get away from my life back on the East Coast for a little while."  
  
"Oh? Are things bad for you?"  
  
"I wouldn't say they are bad really. It's more like it's boring, and a little lonely I'd say. Sure, I have a few acquaintences from work, but it's not like we really hang out all that much. Plus work itself is just depressing. Coming in day after day doing the same thing I've been doin' for the past 20 years writing meaningless reports, taking calls from people I don't want to talk to, it's numbing in a way."  
  
"Didn't you say things weren't bad for you?" Dixon asked.  
  
"They aren't bad. Work is bad, but I never expected it to be good, that's why it's work. I think about it like this, I'm making enough money, I don't have any horrible diseases so I'm fine."  
  
"Yes, I suppose that's a good way to think about it. My question then is, are you happy? If you were to die today would you be content?"  
  
Tino was taken aback by the questions. They seemed so sudden and random.  
  
"I'm not sure. No, wait, if I was to die today I wouldn't be content. I know that much. I am not satisfied with this town. I wouldn't want to die with this hanging over me. So, tell me, what happened to this town?"  
  
Dixon took a deep breath and looked out to the water before turning back to Tino.  
  
"It's not a single event that changed the town or some grandiose story. It's simply a matter of change over time. Perhaps the biggest change is in the residents of Bahia Bay. This is a small town, and there isn't exactly big things going on around here. So as most of the young people grew up they left for various cities where more was happening. In additon it became increasingly expensive to raise a family around here with rising costs so a number of families also left for cheaper towns. Really, the only people who live here anymore are old folks such as myself who are fortunate enough to be pretty well off so they can continue to live here. With the lack of young people around these parts alot of businesses and shops went belly up. A number of them haven't been changed into anything either. Mainly for the reason that there is little profit to be made in opening a new business."  
  
"So these buildings just stay beat up and broken down like this? No one bothers to do anything about it?"  
  
"It is unfortunate but it's true. Not only has this town lost it's beauty but it's become lazy as well. Actually a couple of buldings on the edge of town were knocked down not too long. The one was a drug house and the other was a brothel. It was a bad outfit being run over there. It was rumored that the people who worked those houses had set fire to Funville and a couple more buildings along this stretch. No one's really sure, regardless those people have been put away now. It's a shame to see what Bahia Bay has become. It's a shell of it's former self these days. It's too bad that after 35 years you come back to this."  
  
"Yes, I suppose so. While it's startling, I'm not sure how much impact it has since I've been so far removed from this place for so long."  
  
Dixon was a little bothered by Tino's response. He hadn't expected Tino to be as indifferent as he was.  
  
"I guess that makes sense. But once upon a time you had a life here, a happy and good life at that."  
  
"I do remember, but that life was ripped away from me. This town and everything in it was taken from me. Believe me, I wanted to stay, but there was nothing I could do to stop it from happening."  
  
Tino's words were tinged with anger. Another period of silence fell over the men.  
  
Quietly, Dixon said, "I hope you don't blame your mother. It was out of her hands. She missed you everyday. She cried for a while."  
  
Tino didn't respond at first. He was trying to make sure the emotion would be kept out of his voice.  
  
"Hmph, out of her hands? Nothing but an excuse. I know my mom cared about me, but she made no effort on my behalf back then. She gave up and allowed me to be whisked away to the East coast with my dad."  
  
Dixon shook his head.  
  
"Then if you were so mad with your mom why did you continue to talk with her for a few years after you left?"  
  
"Because even though I was angry with her, she still provided some level of comfort."  
  
"Are you still angry with her?"  
  
Tino paused."I'm not sure."  
  
There was alot Tino didn't know. He hadn't been forced to think like this in a long time. Dixon could see that Tino's hand was shaking a little as he stood there.  
  
He spoke softly, "You know, there was one thing your mother was always hoping for, especially in these past few years. She hoped to see you again. But I'm sure that she saw you at the funeral today. She must be happy."  
  
Tino looked away. His heart had finally been pierced. He could feel once again.  
  
"Is that true?" Tino asked though not in doubt.  
  
"Yes, it is. She always talked about it."  
  
Tino didn't respond. He hadn't felt this much emotion since the day he moved away.  
  
Dixon continued on, "Everyone always wanted to see you again. I wanted to see you, and I wanted you to see everyone."  
  
"Everyone?"  
  
"Yes, your friends, you know, Carver, Lor, and Tish."  
  
The names had long since been foreign to Tino. He had not uttered them or heard them in decades. Yet, their mention flooded his mind with a million memories, so many of them crystal clear as if they had happened the day before.  
  
"The guys..." Tino muttered drifting off.  
  
"Yes, your friends from years ago. It's a real shame that communication died between you. A real shame."  
  
Dixon sounded like he was on the verge of tears as he finished. Tino looked at him covering his face with his hands. The seed of curiousity had been planted, though deep down Tino had a feeling that he did not want the answer to his next question.  
  
"What happened to them?"  
  
Dixon lifted his head and looked to the sky.  
  
"Unlike this town their changes were not the simple passage of time. It was much worse."  
  
Now Tino was certain that he wouldn't like the answer to his question.  
  
"After you left, the three of them were pretty broken up about it but they tried to move on, masking their obvious disappointment. Unfortunately after about six months later they stopped hanging out with each other. They simply couldn't connect anymore. The bond that held them together had vanished. Carver suddenly found himself rising in popularity, Lor was getting in with the jock crowd, and Tish, well, she was left by herself. Each was walking their own path."  
  
"I see. Is that the sad past? That they stopped being friends?" Tino asked.  
  
"No, I'm afraid that is barely scratching the surface. Carver made his way into the high life of the popular kids, and it was there that he was introduced to a life of alcohol and partying. In his drive to be popular he became a heavy drinker, and quite notorious for being stopped for drunk driving. It was an unfortunate problem that followed him into his early twenties."  
  
"Oh? Did he manage to give up alcohol after that?"  
  
Dixon sighed.  
  
"No, he paid the price for his behaviour. One night after he failed to return home his girlfriend called the police worried about him. The police agreed to keep an eye out for him knowing his usual habits of becoming drunk and then aimlessly wandering around town. However, this time they didn't have as much luck, instead they found Carver covered in blood next to an overturned car. Inside the car were two more men. All three of them were dead, and they all had high levels of alcohol in their system."  
  
Tino was stunned. That wasn't the Carver he knew, the one who had at one time ditched the popular kids to continue to hang out with him and the others.  
  
"How... tragic," Tino said softly still trying to process the story.  
  
Dixon nodded in reply.  
  
"As for Lor, she worked hard at sports but she also succumbed to weakness. Durign high school she pushed herself to make sure that colleges would take notice of her, but years of pushing yourself to the limit takes a toll on you. She became less and less satisfied with her abilities and more nervous that she wasn't performing well enough. A fellow athelete offered her some drugs telling her that they would keep her calm, and able to focus. Driven beyond reason, Lor took those drugs and continued to do so. She became addicted and took a nosedive. She wound up never going to college instead she was more concerned about supporting her habit. Lor was hopelessly addicted and even sold herself sometimes to make money for the drugs. It's a shame because she always was a great athelete. Her lack of ability was all in her mind, but she wouldn't listen to anyone. Now she's holed up in prison serving a long sentence on multiple crimes including possession, prostitution, and assault. She never did learn how to control her anger properly. From what I understand she's always creating lots of problems in prison due to fighting."  
  
Tino shook his head, and his throat burned. Another one of his friends had walked a path of destruction.  
  
It was hard to hear, but Tino felt the need to finish out this trainwreck of lives so he asked, "And Tish?"  
  
Dixon didn't answer right away. It sounded like he was trying to repress his emotions before speaking.  
  
"Tish... her story is heart breaking. Forgive me if I am slowing telling the story."  
  
Tino wondered how Tish's past could be much worse than Lor or Carver's.  
  
"I think this will be hard for you to hear, but I hope you'll be strong."  
  
Tino swallowed hard and steeled himself.  
  
"Tish always had a strong bond with you whether you realized it or not. Even though all of you accepted her she felt most at ease with you because the two of you were on the closest wavelength. Countless times it was you and Tish who were paired together. She felt a connection to you because of this. In the group Lor and Carver were the more popular ones while you and Tish were more of the rejects. Tish felt that she could most connect with Lor and Carver while you were around, sort of making you the bridge between her and them."  
  
"I see. I think I kind of knew that already, but that doesn't answer what happened to her."  
  
"Yes I know. I just felt it necessary to establish Tish's frame of mind. Anyway, after you left Tish was the one who felt the worst about it. Not just because she had lost her closest friend but she secretly feared that with you gone that Carver and Lor would drift away from her. She was afraid they become just like everyone else and see her as a weird geek. Unfortunately, her fears came to pass and Carver and Lor did leave her. She never could identify herself with anyone else so she became a loner often purposely secluding herself. However, there was one thing that did drive Tish day after day she was always waiting for you to call her. But as you know, she never got a call from you, nor a letter for that matter."  
  
"I always thought of calling, but everytime I considered it I feared that I wouldn't be able to handle it. I thought I would go crazy talking to Tish or the others but knowing I couldn't return, and everytime I went to write a letter my hand trembled and I couldn't do it. I was afraid. But my mom, I know she must have known my phone number or address. How come she never gave it to Tish?"  
  
"She did, but by the time you told your mother the address and phone number Tish no longer wanted them. She had waited and waited, day after day, month after month, but nothing ever happened. And because of that... she hated you. Tish felt that you had turned your back on her and abandoned her. When Carver and Lor left her she placed the blame on you. All of her anger was directed at you, so when your mother gave her your phone number and address Tish tore them up in a rage. As time went on she increasingly isolated herself with her anger. The only friend she had was her hatred, and it consumed her. She was unable to make new friends and she was unable to make it past her anger with you. Everyday she would lock herself in her room and write away in her diary. One day while Tish's mom was picking up some clothes in her room she found Tish's diary sitting open. The feelings of anguish and sadness that were in the book frightened Mrs. Katsufrakis. Later Tish's parents sat down to talk with Tish about her feelings since they were concerned for her well being. Unfortunately, it only made things worse. Tish was furious with her mother for reading her diary. She claimed that they were invading her privacy and that she couldn't trust anyone anymore that everyone was a liar and a sneak. Tish came to believe that she was isolated from not just the outside world but even within her own home. Unwilling to turn to anyone, Tish's anger soon spawned depression. Her anger and depression eventually came to a head in a horrifying event that I'll always remember clear as day."  
  
Dixon paused as his eyes filled with tears. He held back crying but he couldn't stop his hands from shaking. Dixon wiped his eyes and then continued on.  
  
"I had seen Tish walking home from school a few times, and every time I always noticed how sad she looked so I was concerned about her myself. So one day I stopped at her house to see if I could find anything out. When I arrived Tish's parents explained to me all that had been happening. I felt terrible about it all and I wanted to try and help in any way that I could. Mr. and Mrs. Katsufrakis thanked me and invited me to stay for dinner. I accepted. Mrs. Katsufrakis immediately went to start preparing dinner, but stopped once she couldn't find the knife she used to cut the meat. As soon as she mentioned that she couldn't find the knife something jumped in me. I can't explain it, but instantly I knew what happened to that knife and I only prayed that I wasn't too late. Immediately, I ran up to Tish's room and pounded on the door and called for her to open it. She didn't answer and I feared the worst. Adrenaline pumped through my body and I took a step back and hurled myself at her door. It broke open and I saw the horrifying sight of Tish sitting on the ground with horrible gashes on her wrists and a bloody knife next to her. I ran to her to help, but she tried to push me away. She swung wildly at me hitting me in the face, arms, and chest. Each time she hit me her blood would splatter onto me. Her parents came into the room and I called for their help as well. Mr. Katsufrakis helped me restrain Tish and cover her wounds while Mrs. Katsufrakis ran and called for help. An ambulance came and they took Tish away to treat her. She struggled the whole time they tried to put her on the stretcher. Since her parents had left with the ambulance I was left standing alone in Tish's room. I was covered in her blood and it ran down my face. I looked at my hands and saw her blood there too, dripping to the floor. It was warm, I was trembling, and I felt like screaming."  
  
Dixon paused and cried. He sobbed loudly, but stifled his crying. The story was not yet over.  
  
"On her desk was her suicide note, a horrifying account of what she believed and how she felt. It was the last line, though, that I've always remembered. It said, 'You did this to me, Tino, I'll never forgive you'. She was obsessed in her anger with you. Once her wounds had healed Tish was commited to an institution for rehabilitation. She was there for a number of years. It was hard for her to overcome all of her anger and depression. By the time of her release she was apparently much better though I'm not sure if she was ever completely healed. No one ever knew her true emotional state, and no one ever will now. She has since disappeared. Not a single person has a clue to what happened to her. One day she was here and the next she wasn't. I just hope that wherever she is she's happy."  
  
Dixon stopped and looked at the water. A long silence washed over the two men. Dixon had little left to say and Tino had no idea what to say. His friend had tried to kill herself and she blamed him for it. Tears welled in Tino's eyes.  
  
"Tish blamed me... " he muttered aloud.  
  
Dixon looked at Tino.  
  
"It is probably not wise to dwell on that."  
  
"How can I not? She blamed me, she suffered so much and I'm the cause of it."  
  
Tino paused momentarily and his eyes narrowed.  
  
"No, I am not the one. Tish was a fool. She created her own pain and suffering. By blaming me, she was running away. It wasn't me! It was her! Her! Her! Her! I can't be held responsible for her actions."  
  
Dixon felt a twinge of anger.  
  
"How can you say she was running away? Listen to yourself, you are running away now! I'm not going to blame you entirely because I understand that Tish also holds responsibility for this, but can you honestly deny any part in this? Deep down you are hurting because of this, you are trying to ease that pain by blaming Tish entirely. You don't want to admit your part in this. It was your choice to not call her or to write to her. It was your choice to ignore her. You must be willing to accept those decisions and accept the blame for that."  
  
"I said I wanted to talk to her, but I was afraid! I had my own problems to deal with back then. I don't want to hear this nonsense from you. You weren't me so you can't understand how I felt!"  
  
"What the fuck does it matter if I'm not you?! You know you made the decision to not talk with her regardless, you know you are a part of this. So accept it, and take responsibility for it, damn it!" Dixon yelled enraged.  
  
Tino looked at him horrified. He had never heard Dixon so angry before in his life, and it scared him.  
  
"It's hard to accept it. I don't really want to think of myself as the reason behind my friend's hellish decline. I don't want to think of Lor or Carver as they are now. I don't want to see this town in the shape it's in. But that's just running away, isn't it?" Tino said quietly.  
  
"Yes, it is. I understand, though, that it must be hard to come back to this. But look at this town, when you asked your questions about what had happened surely you couldn't have expected a good answer." Dixon replied just as quiet.  
  
"Good answers... bad answers... I didn't think it would make a difference. I didn't think I would care. I can't understand it. It makes no sense to me. Why am I here?"  
  
"I don't know. I don't think it's important knowing why you are here so much as the fact that you are here. Perhaps, you were led here by God."  
  
"Maybe. If that is the reason then God must have a sense of humor."  
  
"I sure hope God has a sense of humor. If He doesn't then we are all going to Hell."  
  
Dixon smiled despite himself and looked to see if Tino was smiling as well, but he wasn't. Tino's face was emotionless. He looked deep in thought as he stared out to the water. Suddenly, the clouds began to break open and rain.  
  
"Uh-oh, it looks like the storm is finally here. This probably isn't the safest place to be. Tino, I think we should head back now," Dixon said.  
  
Tino didn't respond, he didn't even move.  
  
"Tino, are you all right?"  
  
Now Tino responded, "I'm not sure, but I want to stay here and think."  
  
"Are you sure about that? This is going to be a pretty bad storm."  
  
"Don't worry about me. I'll be fine. I have to think about this now."  
  
Dixon paused, but pushed no further.  
  
"Okay, I understand. Tino, be strong, and remember to keep your eyes open. Make things right with yourself."  
  
Tino turned to Dixon and nodded. With that Dixon was off.

Tino looked back to the water as the rain continued to pour down on him.  
  
End of Chapter Four


	5. I Dream

Seized With Life - Chapter Five: I Dream  
  
"They cried out to the mountains and the rocks, 'Fall on us and hide us from the face of the one who sits on the throne and from the wrath of the Lamb, because the great day of their wrath has come and who can withstand it?' "  
-Revelation 6: 16-17  
  
"Humans make mistakes. There is no way around it. It comes down to matter of it being our nature. It's innate to our very existence. The problem is alot of people don't admit to mistakes or they don't realize their mistakes. Pride can be a very dangerous thing. But for me, pride doesn't matter that much. I admit to my mistakes. Lord knows I've made plenty of them. I couldn't use pride for an excuse even if I wanted to. My reaction to my mistakes comes from the opposite end of the spectrum. I fear them. I've lived my whole life in fear from clowns to seagulls to fearing life itself. As I've moved through life, though, my fears have changed. All except one fear that is. I've always feared mistakes. I'll admit to them, and then I'll run from them. Mistakes just knock me down another notch, or make me have to feel another person's pain in addition to my own. I've always been terrible at facing pain. It hurts. But what's worse is someone else's pain. At least with your own you can feel out what is wrong. You have access to every fiber of your being from your mind to your heart to your soul. When you are dealing with another person you can only scratch the surface, because you become responsible for something you can't understand. I hate having someone else's pain or their burden hanging over me. I can barely deal with my own. Everyone is dealt their own hand in life so each person can deal with their own specific problems. I don't mope around to others and have them deal with my problems and pain so why should I have to shoulder someone else's? I have plenty to worry about already. Pain is inevitable. At some point and time everyone will be afflicted by it. It is unpredictable and can instantly appear. That's why everyone must always be prepared to face pain. If you are ready for it then it will soften the blow and you can handle it by yourself. There should be no need for any assistance. This is what I believe. That's what I think, but then that begs the question, if I believe it why do I have to repeat it to myself? Maybe I'm just trying to fool myself."  
  
"So here I am looking out at the water that I swam in 35 years ago. A storm has broken over this town and it's raining enough for a flood. Lightning and thunder are repeatedly tearing through the sky and the wind might take out a few of the buildings behind me. It's dangerous, so why am I still standing out here? Probably because I can't bring myself to move. I can identify with the weather, it's like a brother to me. It seems very fitting for me. I'm a mix of sadness and anger right now. I think anybody would be considering what I've been told. Words can't really describe the feeling of hearing that one of your friend's is dead, another is a drug addict, and another was suicidal. Then as if that isn't horrible enough but your one friend blames you for it. I've never felt such pain,...... and I hate it. Part of me wants to cry and another part of me wants to scream till I pass out. It hurt alot to leave this town and my friends, but it was something I had no control over. How can I be blamed for that? I guess I could have been in contact with everyone... But I just couldn't do that. I.... feared it. Once again there is fear running my life. I think I'm a coward. I never stood up for myself. I just complained and blamed others. Tish blamed me for her suffering, and I blamed my mom for mine. We wanted to pass the responsibility. We're both weak and we're both cowards. We are human. Neither of us can accept our own pain so we take the coward's way out. We try to blame someone else. I congratulate you now. You've accomplished that. You have given your pain to me, I feel it now. Not only that but I can feel Carver and Lor's pain as well. I can barely stand it. My pain, your pain.... why did you do this to me? I hate you for it. I hate all of you. Not just because of making me suffer, but because I always respected you all. Every one of you failed me. I had confidence in you to be able to make something of yourselves one day. Couldn't any of you find out how to stand on your own two feet? I hate you all for relying on me. I don't have the strength to be a leader. You should have known that...... Why didn't you know that?"  
  
"Everything in front of me is becoming a blur. The tears in my eyes won't let me see things as they are. They are diluting my hatred. My whole body is shaking. Sadness is washing over me now. I want to keep on hating you, but I think that's running away. If I hate you it's the same as blaming you, isn't it? I'm not sure, but I think my heart wants me to believe that. I'm completely drenched from the rain. All of my clothes are sticking to me, and it makes me feel even worse. I may not be able to clearly make out what I see but I can tell that the water is rough out there. The waves are large and they are eating away at the beach. I've never seen water so dark in all of my life. It looks like a sea of darkness swallowing up all who enter it never to return again. Why did I return to Bahia Bay? Maybe it was fate that led me here. I felt something when I got that letter. I knew it was true, I knew I had to go. Maybe I came here to soothe my conscience. I needed to see mom again after blaming her for so long, and this was going to be my last chance. But when I saw her, I couldn't even remember blaming her. It was the most distant thing from my mind. I'm thinking about it now, so mother...... forgive me. I'm sorry that I didn't fufill your wish of getting to see me again. I haven't cried like this in a long, long time. To think I used to be one of the most emotional kids in school. I forgot just how warm tears are. It almost feels good to have them run down my face again...... Wait, there out on the water. You are there. Everyone is there. Lor, Carver, Tish, and mom, all of you are standing there and you are all smiling. I can see you through my tears. Why? After what I put you through, moving away, blaming you, and not speaking to you, why are you smiling at me? I don't understand. I failed all of you. You shouldn't be smiling at me...... Unless, you still have faith in me. I know! We can all be together again! If I make the right choice it will be like none of you are gone. I can still make things right. I thought I might be losing my mind, but I've never thought so clear in my life. Can all of you see this light too? You must be able to because you have shown it to me. When one admits their mistakes, they can do something about it. They can help to right the wrong. All of you look at me now, I am dedicated to you now. You have given me the courage to make my choice. I must hold that courage in order to follow through. I will become a man of dreams. This is my dream, and I will fufill it for myself and for all of you. Now more than ever, I mustn't let fear in my way. I will not run away."

Further down the road the woman stood, having watched Tino the entire time. She had hidden herself from view otherwise the final part of her plan wouldn't have worked. She was soaked and her hair was matted down in front of her face, but tears falling down her face were still visible. Her tears were caught by her smile before they continued on falling to the ground. Everything that she had planned had worked perfectly as if guided by a greater power. Tino received the letter and came to town and then he followed her through town convinently stopping at all the right places. She knew she could count on Dixon being by the water and she could tell by Tino's reaction that everything that needed to be said was spoken. The woman's tears continued to flow, her feelings an eclectic mix that words couldn't do justice. She spoke aloud, but a clap of thunder made her words only audible to herself. And those were the only words she needed to speak. She reached down and ran her fingers across the scars on her wrists and smiled until she cried some more. She was no longer the only one who knew that pain. It all became as distant as a dream, fluttering by like the most beautiful butterflies one can imagine. Tino finally took the responsibility so that past and that pain it existed no more.  
  
THE END  
  
"I dream........ do you?" 


End file.
